Kon's Nightmare
by BlazeCrimson
Summary: Kon has a terrible day. (I'm terrible at summaries and deciding genres. Warnings inside, slight mentions of yaoi)


Authors note:

It's 3:30 A.M. and I have the sudden urge to right fanfiction… I scare myself. I just started this with no idea of what I was writing and what it would be based off… it's just… stuff.

Warnings: Plushie torture with an extreme lack of blood, lots of screams, and fabric being violently removed and re-attached to a plushie. Oh, and somehow yaoi found it's way in here, into the ending. Really all it does is mention GrimmIchi, and that's it. There's also extreme OOCness, but I figured Kon over exaggerates everything. This is in no way meant to be taken seriously.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or any of the characters mentioned in this story.

It was slightly obvious that something was wrong the minute Rukia burst into his room shouting, "DUCK! DUCK FOR COVER!" Ichigo, knowing better than to doubt the midget shinigami, ducked as an oh-so-familiar possessed perverted lion plush was wacked into his room by a broom and sent flying into a window.

Yuzu was standing in the doorway, an annoyed look plastered on her face. "And to think I used to like him…" She muttered. Rukia shot Ichigo a questioning look. Ichigo merely shrugged and pointed to the lion's ear- the one that previously had the flower super-glued onto it. Rukia's eyes lit up in understanding. She mouthed an "oh" and nodded.

Ichigo then directed a glare towards the unconscious plush. "I think we need to do something about him…" Ichigo trailed off. Rukia nodded in agreement. A sadistic smile appeared upon both of their faces as Kon slowly regained awareness. "W-WHA!?" He had no time to recover as he was yanked up by Rukia. Kon looked scared out of his wits as Rukia pulled out a pair of scissors. "I think we need to trim your claws…" She carefully snipped off all three claws on all four paws, making for a grand total of twelve scraps of fabric on the ground, and twelve tortured screams.

Next, Ichigo grabbed a bottle of superglue and two pink fabric flowers. Kon's eyes widened with fear and he began to panic as Ichigo carefully glued a flower to both ears. He then proceeded to remove both flowers by ripping them off, effectively ripping off Kon's ears in the process. Ichigo gave him a grin. "Aww… that wasn't so bad, now was it?" He got no response from the poor lion. "Oh… it seems as if you can't hear me!" He laughed as a beeping noise was heard.

Rukia had just hung up the phone. She smiled. "I just called Uryu," She explained. "He's on his way."

Only a few short minutes later, the black-haired quincy had arrived and has a grin of his own on his face. He pulled out various scraps of fabric, as well as some different buttons and such. "First, I think your eyesight is going bad!" Uryu announced. "Let's replace your eyes." He ripped out both plastic eyes with no remorse as the perverted plush screamed. He chose two bright pink buttons from the pile and unevenly sewed them on to Kon's face. "Oops," He said in mock-guilt, "I guess I'm just lazy today." He then grabbed scrap of fabric that looked like a butterfly wing. "How about to make it up to you, and I give you some wings?"

After seven minutes and much more screaming, Kon had two little butterfly wings. Uryu frowned. "No, I sewed them on wrong." He ripped them off and sewed them right back on. He was still frowning. "Still wrong." They were ripped off again. After the same process was completed several times, Uryu looked quite frustrated. "Hmm. Well, I suppose instead I could remove that nasty tail of yours. I'm sure you don't want it!" Kon sobbed out in pain as Uryu took scissors and cut off Kon's tail one piece at a time in very small pieces. When the quincy was finished, there was only a small shred of fabric left where his tail had once been. As the evil trio of torturers started to pull of the fabric that made his mane, he passed out and fell headfirst into a pile of his own stuffing.

When the lion plush awoke, he sat of slowly, rubbing his head. He froze when he felt ears. He looked at his paws and saw claws. He looked behind him. He had a tail! He sighed in relief. It was all a terrible nightmare, and he had awoken just fine on the floor of Ichigo's room. As he looked over towards the bed, he screamed. He had awoken from one nightmare, only to end up in another!

There Ichigo was, sleeping in his bed, in the arms of Grimmjow.


End file.
